they dont teach us that love is like the government. its taxing. and while sometimes it can be frustrating, its very rewarding and we should happy we have it. oh, and it controls your life. just like the government.

oh, by the way, I got into college. Washington University. now high school doesnt matter anymore. that's what being a second semester senior is all about.

maybe I'd talk about that. or about being conned into giving blood. or about people's obsession with snow days. or why i'm not using any caps. but frankly, i'm lazy. maybe later.

I wrote this essay in Journalism class, as to why I wouldn't want to be a teacher. Now I share it with you:

It isn't easy being a teacher. While shorter days and summers off may seem attractive to many jealous year-round professionals, consider for a moment how unpleasant it is to be a teacher. Imagine over 100 students wishing every day that something bad happens to you, such as a sickness or car breakdown. All those bratty students every day, ignoring your words or disrupting you as you simply try to do your job. And don't think that you get a shorter work day. All those piles and piles of tests and papers to grade; many teachers work hours into the night. And yet, that's not even the most difficult part

The most obvious reason why it would suck to be a teacher is the mountain of paperwork to process and grade. Unit tests, small quizzes, constant homeworks, and perhaps worst of all, the essays. The teacher's day may seem to be over at 2pm, but in fact, they work long into the afternoon, and occasionally at night. They even work through their lunch break. Worse than the time, is the tedium. Over 100 students hand in identical assignments, most with horrendous handwriting. Having to decipher the cryptic assignments dozens of times in a period of time suited for only half the work is enough to inspire most people to tear out their hair.

If you think that the two months off in the summer justifies 10 months of hard work, you'd be wrong. Teachers do not take breaks in the summer. Many teachers have to make their new curriculum, attend learning seminars, or even go for advanced degrees! Ms Moliterno spent years of summer striving hard for her masters, when she wasn't busy in Syracuse taking the course which her students would be taking themselves over the next year. And for all of this hard summer work, teachers can get paid.. If they agree to take smaller checks during the school year. Smaller checks on an already lackluster salary. Teachers are not in it for the money. It's more hard work and stress than a business executive, with far less pay.

So then, why would teachers volunteer to do such a mission impossible? For the love of students, of course. I interviewed my current and former English teachers (because they were all in one place, the English department office) to find out. Their names have been shortened to protect my ass from possible repercussions. Ms M. chose to be in English for the rest of her life, a choice she continues to be pleased with. Ms S. believes that the love of students is the most important aspects, and once a teacher grows tired of kids, it's time to move on. Dr. R. believes the goal of a teacher is to move students a step forward by the end of the year. To her, a teacher fails when a student stays static throughout the year. The most difficult thing to her is when she can't reach a student because of forces outside her control, like a death in the family.

Interviewing these teachers, something becomes very apparent: teachers love teaching. They don't care if the students groan when they walk in late, or that their salary is disproportionately low to their workload. If not for the fact that people need money to live, many teachers would probably teach for free. Knowing this, its hard not to gain a little more respect for what they do. Maybe we can all make their lives easier by being nicer to them in class. Or by handing in less homework.

Right now, it feels like my brain is trying to gnaw its way out my ear. Partially because I'm bored to the point of making a blog entry at the unseasonably early hour of 2pm (but not to the point of writing that 1000 word essay due on Monday), but mainly because the slow ticking of the clock as approaches next week is worse than the Tell-Tale Heart.

And what might you ask is in one week that is driving me insane? My first college acceptance/rejecting letter. While not found in a chocolate bar, this Golden Ticket is going to tell me what I'm going to do for the next (and arguably most crucial) four years of my life. The overwhelming urge for instant gratification which plagues my generation is turning this inflexible date into a torture device. I know that once I get this letter of acceptance, my work is done. I take the midterms, and I only have to not fail for the rest of the year. It will be the greatest feeling.

But is it the waiting or the uncertainty that pains me? Both, really. It holds me in a state of suspense. It's like dangling a candy bar in front of a fat person on a treadmill. I crave to know, right now, but its just one step or one week out of my reach. And instead of making me feel better, the closer the day gets, the more agonizing it becomes. It fills my waking thoughts and torments me at night (when I'm not dreaming of sexy naked ladies). Why, you sadistic college admissions people, must you do this to me?

Personally, I think it would almost be better knowing that I'm not in now, then not knowing my fate and not being able to for months. This is why college admissions shouldnt say when they plan to give you an answer. It should be a surprise. Instead of giving an acceptance/rejecting mailing date, they should say "any time between the day we recieve it and AP week" That would actually make it kind of easier. Then, instead of a cold impersonal letter, they should show up to your house with balloons, streamers, and a giant sign saying either You're In or You're Out. I would prefer it if Ed McMahon delivered it personally, along with an oversized check.

While I can only speak for myself, I'm sure these same thoughts plague all high school seniors, although in different degrees depending on how much you give a crap about college. I'd hate to be an overachiever right now. Or ever, really.

By the way, if I find out in a week that I dont get into my early decision choice college, I'm going to have to wait until April to find out from the others. Here we go again...

Mythbusters is a show on the Discovery Channel. Two special effects gurus test myths. Sounds simple enough. But what makes the show so entertaining is to watch their resorcefulness. For example, in today's episode, they wanted to test this myth:

"A cannon is used to launch chickens at airplane fuselages to test how they would hold up to bird strikes in the air. The US Air Force uses it all the time. Then, the British air force decided to try it. However, their gun strikes caused massive destruction. They complained to the U.S. that their gun was highly overpowered, and provided a video to prove it. The U.S. replied "thaw your chickens". Mythbusters decided to see if there really was a major difference between a frozen or thawed chicken at such a high velocity.

Pretty neat, right? But what I love is their ingeniousness. They built their own chicken gun from the ground up using scrap parts. It was simply amazing. And yes, the frozen chicken was much more damaging. Even better is when they fail. This is when they go above the call of duty. When a washing machine failed to toss around a person standing in it. they decided to remove the motor, get an electric car motor, and when it didnt fit, manage to link it using a motorcycle chain. The frankenwasher nearly tore the crash dummy's legs off.

I just enjoy watching the show so much because I can relate to their relentless inquiry. I have a fond memory from 7th grade. Our science class was to design a simple two pulley system. Most of the class was struggling. I managed to do it in about a minute. So I decided to see just how compled of a rig I could create. Legend says I got it up to 8. It's why I love science class. I want to try new things, go beyond what was already done, and see what I can create. In my mind, being host of the Mythbusters is the perfect job. I can fufil my other love, being seen by thousands of people in a non-scandal situation. My only hope to do that one is to host my own show or abduct a rich person's child.

Anyway, there are just some classes I love and some I hate. The difference is whether I want to try something or whether I'm forced to. I like science because I can tinker, but I only like it if the teacher lets my tinker. Physics was dull because it was all theoretical, but Forensics is fun because everything is hands-on. Instead of being told, we learn. We do. The Socratic method: learning by questioning. Plus, we solve crimes as tests, and that's just cool. The only other classes I like are Journalism and Government. Journalism because I just talk to my friends all period, and occasional creative write, and Government because we just debate all period. Ironically, I hate regular English because its all forced. Just like this blog, and just like in science class, I can tinker, or in this case express myself, in Jouralism and Government. It's all about satisfying my intellectual curiosity without having boring crap jammed down my throat.

So yeah, that's just a little insight into what makes me tick. I may be a lazy school-hating slacker, but I look forward to Forensic Science every morning. It makes waking up not so terrible. The bagel and cream cheese I eat in class doesnt hurt none, either.

Oh, and just a tip: write your blog entries in Microsoft Word. It automatically saves it. So if shit happens, such as a freak power surge right as you finish, it will still survive. I made that mistake last time I was going to update this blog. I wrote a wonderful entry on why I hate quizzes and surveys, and it got erased in a heartbeat. Damn that Murphy and his pessimistic law! And damn me for not taking my own advice. Watch this entry get wiped out in 3... 2.... 1.... eat that, Murphy!

I know I promised my next entry would be about teen drinking. But this is more time-relevent. I'll get back to drinking next time I binge and puke.... which might be next weekend. But before it slips my mind, I'd like to share my new years resolution with all of you.

My resolution is as shallow, immature, and self-centered as they come. It's so typically teenager, its pathetic. But guess what? I'm a teen. I'm sure you saw it coming, and you probably had the same desires at my age. Naturally, my new years resolution is to lose the shackle known as virginity. I'm going to graduate and go to college this year; its about time I got laid.

Now, some of you may be sitting there, thinking "What's taking so long? I lost mine years before you!" and some might say "You're far too young to be having sexual relations. Dont make me force you to wear my old chastity belt...", but the fact of the matter is that it is the perfect time. My english class did some social science research, and determined that about a third of the grade has had sex, and more than half will by year's end. While I'm most likely not the typical high school student, I refuse to be in the sexual minority. And even if I do graduate a virgin, that still leaves me half a year in college to get laid, and most people do in the first month anyway.

The purpose of this post was not to simply lament my current state of existance, or gloat to those who wont have sex until 2006. My new years resolution is surprisingly noble. Sure, being a horndog isnt exactly noble, but the quest for self-betterment is. Arent all new years resolutions a vow to improve yourself in some way? The point is, I'm not bettering myself by earning bragging rights or losing a derogatory title, it's the process. The journey is always more important than the destination. Still confused? In modern society, we're very picky about who we want to have sex with. We all want to bag a girl or boy (pick one or both) with a pretty face, a sexy body, a winning personality radiating confidence, who's always fun to be with. If I plan on getting laid, I'm going to need the aformentioned traits.

So, how do I get them? Through a slow and deliberate process of self-improvement. For example, girls love tall bulky guys. I got the tall down, but I'm alittle on the thin side. Time to get a gym membership, get off my lazy ass, and earn muscles and women. No money for a gym membership? Time to stop leeching off my parents and get a job. Need that confidence? Gotta train myself. Get out and meet people. Go to more parties. Learn how to pick up girls. No clue how to have a fun date? Go out more with friends, try new activities, start suggesting plans instead of just tagging along with others. Basically, by turning myself into a girl magnet (aka, working for the sake of others), I'm making myself an all-around better person (aka, working for myself), while still holding onto the core me. Finally having sex will just be the capstone on a year-long self improvement project.

Yeah, its definatey going to be worth the long journey, and all the anticipation is only going to make it feel sooo much better....................................................


......................... no, not that "good feeling", the pride and self-satisfaction I'll have for accomplishing my goals. Pervert.

For the record, I'm drunk outtta my mind and I threw up three times. I dont have much to write because I cant form logical thought. Be happy I dont misspell as much as I cant. Goodnight, world. Happy 2005.



Five hours later: I only got 3 and a half hours of sleep, I'm horrifyingly nausious, the only thing on TV is a two year old dog show on animal planet, and I think I have vomit in my nose... from 6 hours ago. Someone, kill me and put me out of my misery. I think I've been inspired to make my next entry, about teenage drinking. I'll have plenty to say. When I'm no longer drunk, sick, or hung over.

Oh, and one piece of advice:

NEVER MIX DRINKS!

If you were bad at something, should you give up? If you dont have the patience, should you stop waiting? Or perhaps wait no longer, if the situation applies. If there's nothing to do, should you procrastinate doing work? How about fun? These questions plague me this winter break, and it urges me to write another entry after long hiatus.

As befits a rich spoiled kid from a grade-inflating school district, I dont enjoy doing work. If I have nothing to do, and the pain of boredom is overwhelming, I wont do work. Is anybody else like that, or is it just me? I will sit on the same ond websites, forums, chatrooms, and tagboards, refreshing every minute or so, waiting for someone to say something. This miraculously passes time. Then it becomes late, and I lament how I have achieved no work. I pledge to go to sleep. And I dont for another few hours. Thus, the name of the blog, latenight.

Yet, somehow, even writing in my blog has become work. I have become that much of a living waste. But the people (and by people, I mean 2) crave the return of my rants. Such as this one. So I post on the blogdrives forums asking for advice as to how I can be motivated. I spend a few hours there. Ironic, I couldve written atleast three blog entries in that time, but I'd rather sit on my computer and write (on a forum about my laziness to write) than write (intelligence in the forum of a blog). I also sit on the main site tagboard, and write, telling people about my day, and asking for the resolve I need to write. See the problem?

And thus returns us to the original question. What should I do in this situation? Somebody told me that I shouldnt have a blog in this case. But is that the answer. When you dont have the urge to do something, to not do it? It all seems so easy. But then something dawned on me. If we didnt do anything unpleasant, then we wouldnt do anything. What in life is pleasant besides a good meal, a good nap, and a good sexing? To the typical senior in high school, that is. Most good things in life are unpleasant. The good part comes later, when you look at what you've accomplished with contentment and satisfaction. Right now, I'm paining myself by pulling myself away from my lethargy (and watching Read or Die for like the 5th time, despite me practically memorizing it). But afterwards, I'll read it, become smug, and appreciate the effort I put in it. This blog is just another life experience. Why waste it?

Or I could just ramble, livejournal-style. Much like what I already do, except I dont tell you my mood, song of the moment, or the bad poetry I wrote. And I usually have a point, obscure as it may seem. My point here being that you cant let yourself fall into the rut of hoping for something to happen to break your boredom. Get off your lazy ass and run headlong into the "pain" of doing something. It's better than boredom.

Does your school have yearbook senior quotes? You know, you chose a quote to go next to your picture in the yearbook, to be remembered for all antiquity. Well, I hate them. Can you really condense everything about you into one quote, limited to only about 150 characters? I dont. Anyway, this particulary essay is going to be broken up into two parts. In part 1, I'll tell you whats wrong with senior quotes. And in part 2, I'll tell you some of my friend's senior quotes, and compare them to the real person.

There are generally two types of quote: historical and lyrical. Historical quotes are famous sayings by famous people of times past. Lyrical quotes are taken from song lyrics. Usually from the past decade. Guess which type is the stupid one.

That was a loaded question. They're both stupid. People either browse Quoteland or some song lyrics site, and pick the quote that they want. But the thing is, the quotes are almost always random. They relate little to graduation or what the person is really like. Quasi-philosophical Dave Matthews Band lyrics about life relate little to the matter at hand. You're going to look back on these quotes 20 years from now and go "What the hell was wrong with me?" You want a quote that fully captures your mindset at this age. Something representitive. Something that when you read next to someone's name, you can say "Oh, that's so him/her!"

Then again, maybe you shouldnt. I cant imagine how many countless senior quotes will be variations of the saying "Just Blaze." The true stoner idiots might do something like that, but I bet most of those who use that type of quote are just posing. They want to pretend they're a big pothead. But who cares? The point of the yearbook is that by the time you read it, you wont even remember the other people in it. Who are you competing with? It's probably just to look back with a sense of superiority, but more than likely, you'll wish you were alilttle less retarded back in high school.

Basically, people chose their senior quotes on the basis of feeling good about themselves. People either want to blend in socially now, or they want to pretend they were better than they really were when remembering. Stoners will always brag about how much they toke, geeks will try to assert their intellectual superiority over the unwashed masses, artists will pretend they wre some kind of child prodigy... Senior quotes accomplish just the opposite of what they intend. Instead of being a window to a person's inner mindset, its just a way of dressing up their outer self to make them seem different than the person they really are. So read senior quotes, but take them with a grain of proverbial salt.

As I write this, I'm in Journalism class. We spent 3 days in the computer
lab typing up a small article which should be able to be completed in 2
days. The extra day was just for the hell of it. Two things are going on
here: I'm wasting the class's time, and the class is wasting my time.
With all off this waste, you'd think there would just be less days in the
school year. Ha, I wish.

School exists for two reasons: to teach us and babysit us. And most of
the teaching is pointless. Unless your a chemist, is there any reason to
take chemistry? In fact, most sciences are wasted. There should just be a
class covering the basics of all the sciences in one year. Unless you
plan on going into science as a possible career, like me. Also, math.
None of that math will ever ever be needed in real life. Hyperbolas and
Asymptopes are a waste of hypothetical space. Math stopped being useful
to real life in middle school. Social Studies and History can be useful,
since its been said that those who dont understand history are liable to
repeat it. Its also been said that those who dont understand history vote
for the candidate with the better hair. So, you dont need to know history
to have an effect on the country, even if it is negative. Those who are
educated in history and government are smart enough to know they cant
really have much of a positive effect on the world alone, so they dont
try. History and Political education is wasted. Foreign language can be
useful... if the area you live in is bilingual. If you're like me, and go
to a school which is mainly wasps and english-speaking asians, its not
necessary. Especially since Chinese and Korean are not offered languages.
Its a waste. Probably the biggest waste has to be English class. I speak
it, I write it. What more is there?! I dont need to analyze crappy books
from the 18th century to be able to speak and write well. And if you're
not good at english, thats what we have "Hooked On Phonics" for.

So, I'm really only taking two good classes. Economics and Physical
Education. Economics is actually useful math for the future, when I
either own a home and/or a business and need to make smart decisions. And
Physical Education is good to get our fat lazy asses out of those
desk-chairs (you know, the chairs with the desk attatched to them..). Our
country has the highest obesity rates. Force those tubbies-to-be to get
out and run. The funny part is that each of those classes is offered only
every other day. So, put them together, and you get one useful period
every day. It seems the other 8 periods are just for babysitting. School,
its a waste of 6 hours, minus 40 minutes, every weekday.

This may be the shortest entry ever. But it may explain the lack of posts recently. And its simple. There's nothing to talk about. Almost every entry in my blog has had a point; this isnt a stupid diary. But, what is there to make a point about if there's nothing to make a point about? Ever since that Bat Mitzvah on Saturday, I've done nothing special. I've survived two days of school. I've been struggling to keep up in math. I wrote a stupid poem in the style of "Why I Hate Poetry", and got a good score on it. I wrote a timed essay on why religious education sucks, and nearly sprained my wrist. But what can I blog about? Simply, nothing. Its not like I can lean back in my rocking chair and recount old war stories. Watch, here was my day:

Woke up late
Scrambled to get out on time
Got a bagel at bagel master
Parked correctly for once
Ate my bagel in Forensic Science Class
Measured a fake skeleton
Wrote a timed essay, nearly sprained my wrist
Read the newspaper during Jouralism class
Learned how to synthetic divide a third-power polynomial in order to simply fractions in pursuit of isolating limits
Watched some bizzare educational cartoon in Japanese for Japanese class
Attemped to do my math homework, couldnt finish it.
Sat through a debate on leadership in Government class
Debated with my conservative Government teacher after class
Ate a cheeseburger and fries from Burger King
Took a 3.5 hour nap from 3:30 to 7pm
Cook and ate a steak
Watched TV
Watched premeire of CSI: NY
Wrote this blog entry

Fascinating story, right? NO, IT'S LAME! I dont want to just tell you how my day went. It's dull. My life is rather dull. I'd rather wait until something interesting inspires me, so I may entertain my small readership. Maybe I'll write an entry about Forensic Pathology or Why I Hate Celebrities. You'll thank me later.

Speaking of thanking, I'd like to thank a friend of mine for making this link button for me. Use it. It'd make me happy.


Until next time, keep complaining!